


Can't pour from an empty mug

by Gyfen



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Asexual Character, Dom/sub Undertones, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Masturbation, School is stressful when you're the protagonists, Verbal Humiliation, Voyeurism, mostly smut tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:46:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26115148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gyfen/pseuds/Gyfen
Summary: Fitzroy sighed at his homework and slumped over in his desk. Who knew if there was a point to getting good grades when the world might end in a demon war in half a year, but damned if he wouldn't also try to stay top of his class. It was just so stupid. He'd been stuck trying to formulate an introduction to an essay on these magical properties he'd never even heard of until this week.
Relationships: Argo Keene/Sir Fitzroy Maplecourt
Comments: 3
Kudos: 63





	Can't pour from an empty mug

**Author's Note:**

> Hey I really hope I did justice to Fitzroy! Most of what I write is nsfw so I've been trying to learn how to respectfully write an ace character in these situations.

Fitzroy sighed at his homework and slumped over in his desk. Who knew if there was a point to getting good grades when the world might end in a demon war in half a year, but damned if he wouldn't also try to stay top of his class. It was just so stupid. He'd been stuck trying to formulate an introduction to an essay on these magical properties he'd never even heard of until this week. 

One moment there was just the dull background noise of life outside his dorm room window and the next there was an entire bare chested genasi draped around his shoulder.

"Fitz, I'm bored," Argo whined into his ear.

"Well unless you know a whole lot about the intraspecular phonetics of truenaming, I don't see how I can help you."

Argo flipped back from Fitzroy's desk and into a tremendous phoon towards his bed. "Yeuck. That wasn't really what I was thinking."

"What, do you want to go play with the literal demonic dogs prowling our campus? Maybe stick a note that says 'kick me' on our headmaster, who is also the devil by the way, with your plus ten to stealth?" Fitzroy asked, crossing out yet another false start.

Argo rolled his eyes. "I told ya, Fitz, ya can't be in yer head about it all the time. Can't pour from an empty mug."

Fitzroy turned around. "What do you mean?! I don't understand how you can't be in your head about it! There's a billion things we don't know about this huge war that I've- we've- suddenly become, what? The militant youth leaders of some nonexistent army? All because the Wiggenstaffs couldn't fucking be cool, and then there's this random chasm and my- and- what have I told you about wearing shirts in polite society?!" 

Argo grinned a sharp smile. "I don't remember such a pro-shirt stance from you last night," he said, but backed off as he saw the first sign of sparks in Fitzroy's hair. "Of course I'm worried, Fitzroy. This is enormous and unbelievably bad. Bad's not even the right word but there's not really any words for it. I also know that if I stress myself out to the point of paralysis about it, that helps literally nobody. I think you need to get away from work."

Fitzroy calmed down a little, but he still huffed. "And I suppose your solution is to seduce me away with your roguish ways? Good luck, Argonaut, but I'm a man of high moral principles. Also, I'm quite mad still. Wink."

As Fitzroy turned to sit down at his desk, Argo pinched the bridge of his nose. Might as well do what he came in here for in the first place. "Seriously, Fitz. I don't wanna do anything you don't. But my hair was standing up from the electricity in the air all the way in the other room! Ya can't possibly be doing anything productive right now."

Fitzroy raised an eyebrow. "Well, I don't remember such an anti-'sparks in the air' stance from you last night, Mr. Keene."

"Oh, lay off it. Nothing's plain with you. Kiss me? Be mean to me? In the way that isn't just dismissive and dickish, but the way that I like? I'll be good for you, Fitz, as long as you want me to," Argo pleaded, watching Fitzroy carefully to see if he was judging his mood accurately. 

Fitzroy turned his chair around. "So," he scoffed, "is Argonaut Keene so needy that he can't get himself off in his room alone? You have to have me watch you? Am I getting that right?" he grinned as Argo's eyes went wide and he sat himself up on the bed. "Well?"

Argo gulped. He scooted towards the edge of the bed to kiss Fitzroy, but all he got for his effort was a finger on his lips pushing him back. 

"Ah, ah, ah, darling. I'm very green on this but it seems to me you came into this room with a one track mind, and that was to annoy me into paying attention to your dick. You've got my attention, try not to lose it now. Scoot back and show me what you're working with, if my eyes on you are that important." Fitzroy finished his statement then flashed an ok symbol and made what he hoped were question-y enough eyebrows are Argo. 

Argo nodded and moved himself back towards the headboard. "Uh yeah, I'm, very very green. Uh, what do- what should I- what do ya want me to do?"

Fitzroy laughed. "I should hope a genasi as hopelessly horny as you would have figured that part out already. Get out of your clothes, for starters. No use in pretenses when I know how badly you want to be on display for me."

Argo unlaced his pants and pulled them off along with his underclothes. He felt Fitzroy's eyes roam every inch of his bare skin and felt his face get hot with embarrassment at the same time as the rest of his blood rushed further down. 

Fitzroy yawned. "Let's get a move on, Argonaut, I haven't got all day."

Argo quickly settled back down into the bed. He inhaled deeply before spitting in his hand and reaching it down to work himself to full hardness. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back.

It was so good, having Fitzroy order him around. Argo had always been an exhibitionist, but never this submissive and needy to any other partner. There was something about the half-elf, though… maybe the dynamic of their villain/henchman partnership, or maybe something about Fitzroy's incredible non-obvious strength…. Argo always wanted to respect his asexuality, and he was extremely into the arrangement they'd worked out when he craved intimacy. Fitzroy enjoyed being able to fall into the easy dominant persona once he saw what it did to Argo. Argo turned his head to moan into the pillow as he twisted his hand up and down around his cock while the other palmed his balls.

"Aw, do the pillows smell like me? Dirty, dirty rogue. What's next, rifling through my drawers just to smell my underclothes? I can't believe the things that get you going."

Argo rolled his eyes into the pillow but couldn't ignore the heat he felt at his shameful tone of voice. He teased his head before returning to pumping up and down. "Yeah, I suppose some punishment might have to be handed out if I did anything like that. Oh, the horror."

Fitzroy stretched in a practiced way, looking casual and cool while never taking his eyes off the genasi in his bed. "The problem with trying to punish you is that you're such a slut for it. Anything I'd do to you, you'd take it and ask for more. Maybe I should get a good paddle. Shocking grasp is only a cantrip, but even that feels like a waste on you."

Argo shifted so he could thrust into his hand better. He could feel himself getting closer. He rolled his left nipple between the fingers of his other hand and felt even more shame in a sudden self awareness of how loud he was panting. "Fuck… Fitzroy…"

"Hmm? What was that?"

"Please, could you use…" Argo tried to put on his best puppy dog eyes as he looked at his villain. "Use shocking grasp, please, I need it, shock me, please…." 

Fitzroy scooted his desk chair closer and once again feigned nonchalance. "Wish I could pretend to be surprised," he said. He put his hand on Argo's thigh and rubbed it back and forth. "Then again, reliability is one of your greatest strengths." Argo felt himself jolt at the feeling of Fitzroy's hand grabbing his cock, then really jolt at the electricity running through him. He lost himself to the blinding white feeling as Fitzroy stroked him through his orgasm. 

His hips slowly stuttered to a stop as he lolled his head back to catch his breath. "Mmh… nh… thank you, sir…" he mumbled.

"Well, if I knew that's all it took to get you using my title, I would've been doing this from day one," Fitzroy said. 

"C'mon, not like! Not like that… goddammit…" Argo sat himself up. "Fuck off… damn knighthood..."

Fitzroy grinned at him. "Yeah, you're not living that one down for a while. C'mon, let's clean you up." He fetched a handkerchief from his bedside table and Argo cast shape water to help wipe them both clean. He pulled his pants back on and lay back down on the bed, still high on endorphins. Fitzroy followed and busied himself combing through Argo's long hair.

"Thanks for doing that. I mean, it's really… I'd feel hesitant even askin' a partner who i knew was down for more, uh, conventional sex to say some of those things to me." 

"Hmm," Fitzroy leaned down to kiss Argo. "No judgement here, darling. It's fun to watch you squirm the way you do. I'd never mean those cruel words truly, but you were right. It was a good distraction. You like what you like, and I like you." 

"Alright." Argo smiled up at the half elf with beautiful eyes and strong arms. "I like you too."


End file.
